Tuesday, 27 April 2004

Worst Song Ever

Blender magazine this month has a list of the 50 worst songs ever... the site only has #50-41, but I'm hard pressed to believe that "My Heart Will Go On" is only at #50. I suspect vote-rigging to entice people to buy the magazine. Apparently "We Built This City" is at #1... I put that in my list of "too cheesy/kitschy to be a truly awful song" category, like Charlene's "I've Never Been To Me".

So what's a truly awful song? Hmmm. Off the top of my head,
  • Jessica Simpson, "I Think I'm in Love" - I think I've gone deaf
  • Limp Bizkit, "Rollin'" (and numerous others... man is Fred Durst lame)
  • The Vengaboys, "We Like to Party" - destroying dancefloors everywhere!
  • Ricky Martin, "She Bangs" - it blows.
  • Collin Raye, "Love, Me" - too many mawkish faux-sentimental songs
  • Dan Fogelberg, "Leader of the Band" - when we first were made to look at the lyrics of this song in Secondary 1 or 2 (Lord knows why!), our juvenile minds couldn't stop laughing at the line "his blood runs through my instrument". We were right then.
  • Michael Bolton, "Said I Loved You (But I Lied)" - oh come on, be a lying bastard, don't give me the "this is more than love I feel inside" crap.
Ooh, I found a site with the full list of bad songs. Yeah, "Two Pumps and a Bump" is really, truly awful. Was it ever a hit?? And what, no Michael Bolton? All right, this train of thought has gripped me - will try to name some more awful songs as they come to my mind. I forcibly try to shut them out by singing that reliable ol' standby, the Jackson 5's "I Want You Back". Great to have a song that's irrepressibly catchy while having one hell of a bassline.



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